Media

WEDDING guests used to cry because they were choked up with emotion. These days it could well be their empty wallet that’s bringing a tear to the eye.

While the average cost of hosting a wedding - at around the $30,000 mark - is not to be sniffed at, attending weddings can also be a serious pocket drain.

It all starts with the engagement party, followed by the hen’s or buck’s do, perhaps a new outfit for the wedding, the wedding present, and in some cases the cost of travelling to the venue and accommodation. Repeat that a few times over the wedding season and things start to tot up.

Hens'and bucks' parties can stretch from a few drinks out on the town to activity-packed weekends away. Guests are expected to shout the bride and groom, as well as buy a small gift.

Sucheta Kotwal, director of hens.com.au says the most popular price bracket for a hen’s night is $50-75 a head, plus chipping in about $10 each for a gift for the hen.

But weekends away can stretch the budget into the $500-800 per person range.

“That’s the kind of thing you’d do with four or five close girlfriends rather than a big hen’s party with 20 girls.”

Once you’re done with pre-wedding celebrations its time to fork out for a gift.

About 114,000 marriages take place each year in Australia. The average guest list is between 80-120 people – although in Melbourne it’s not unusual for that to balloon to 200-300.

That means up to 11 million people will be buying wedding gifts, contributing to an industry worth an estimated $5 billion according to research by Bride to Be magazine.

Karaline Loiterton, owner and managing director of bridal registry company Wedding List, says on average guests spend between $100 - $150 on a wedding present. Depending on their relationship with the happy couple, this could fall to as low as $20 or stretch into the thousands.

For this reason Ms Loiterton encourages the happy couple to include a broad range of gifts on their registry, with plenty at the lower end of the cost scale..

“They might be inviting a friend from work who’s coming by herself, not bringing a partner and may not know the couple very well. People have to feel comfortable with what’s on the list. “

Nationality and cultural norms also play a part in how much guests spend on a present. Ms Loiterton says American guests at Australian weddings tend to spend much more than their local counterparts.

“The trend seems to be that Americans spend a lot more – they might spend $200-300 if not more. The British would not spend as much, but again that might be that often they’re not going to the wedding, so that might be more of a token thing.”

The tendency for smaller presents from British guests might have something to do with the fact that in their homeland open bars are not always provided, so they might be expecting to put their hands in their pockets for their drinks at the reception.

With the average age of brides now 29 and grooms 32, many don’t want another toaster or dinner set and instead ask for cash.

This has led to the advent of Wishing Wells, or Money Trees, which are usually set up in reception areas for guests to drop cash into. Couples have the option of adding an explanatory poem to the well to coax guests into giving.

But Ms Loiterton says Australian guests still seem reluctant to give cold hard cash.

“From our conversations with the hundreds of couples we deal with, guests – especially Australian guests – do not necessarily feel comfortable giving cash. It’s a cultural thing, in certain circles it’s totally acceptable.”

She says guests seem more at ease with the idea of contributing money towards something specific – such as a honeymoon register- or buying vouchers for an activity or experience – like hot air ballooning, cooking classes or sailing lessons.

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